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Praise even if you’re bored, fat and broke | Broken Mender | Julanie J

Hi, I’m Julanie and I’m a mender. I’ve come to notice that I am a fixer (of people and broken things) and sometimes it’s draining.

2023 has already started hot and ready, and I feel a little behind. Have you ever just felt as if the days are running away from you, and you’ve not yet achieved anything significant? Well don’t worry girl, me too.

I’m a busy bee, I’ve got to keep my body and mind busy, otherwise it’s a slippery slope of PJ’s and books and way too many unwanted calories. But although my new year started with a bang, it has now sizzled down, and I’ve been slow, and not in a good way. In truth, my work has, in a sense, dried up. Clients are either changing deadlines or even cancelling projects all together, and nothing else is taking their place, and that leaves me with two major problems, especially when I’ve got way too much time on my hands. The moment I’m bored, I do things that I probably shouldn’t, and most of it is food- related. Boredom equals me being hungry. “Didn’t I just eat breakfast? Yeah but another piece of toast looks good.” Small things become big things and before I know it I’ve created a habit of feeding my body lies and comforting it in the worst possible way. Look, I’m definitely not a calorie counting girl, but there is a major difference between momentary indulgence and constant overeating, and unfortunately I’m on the wrong side of the scale when I’m bored.

The second problem I have when I’m not busy is being broke. Let’s face it, if we don’t work we don’t bring home the bacon. Perhaps it’s just me, but when I’m financially unbalanced, it affects my mood. Stress isn’t ever fun but financial stress, my friend, is a whole other ball game. I’ve heard this saying so many times- “Fear is a liar” and yes, I believe it wholeheartedly, but when it comes to financial problems, fear sometimes, OK, most times, gets the better of me. When those bills start piling up and the arrangements you’ve made aren’t working out, it becomes tiring and draining. The mix of these two things is never good, but what now?

Look, I definitely haven’t figured it out yet. All I know is what’s worked for me. And to be  brutally honest, it doesn’t always work out, but it helps. The only thing that significantly improves my mood and actions is praise. Yes, I know you’ve heard it before, but it’s the most helpful tool I’ve got for you. Music is always my method, that’s just who I am, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that it’s my advice, but let me tell you, when we praise, we change our immediate atmosphere. It’s an encouragement to oneself, it’s an acknowledgment of something bigger than yourself, and it’s humbling. Humility brings forth vulnerability, and when you praise like it’s your own only shot, your way out, then, girlfriend, praise just became a weapon, and you can use it to fight whatever it is you’re facing. You might not see the problem dissolving, but you’ll have the strength to confront it!

However, praise will cost you, it will ask you to leave your insecurities, boundaries and straight up appearance. You can’t be worried what you might look like when praising; sure, you’ll feel like a fool, but you continue. The requirement to praise has always been for you to let go and serve. As I said before, it might not solve your problems, but you’ll be equipped to push through. Praise might not have been the answer you were looking for, but it’s the only one I’ve got for you. No matter what, girl, just praise!

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